A Lengthy Response

Dear friends,

I had thought that as I prepared for my 7th annual fast near the end of last year, I had said everything that I have to say on this matter. However, as a few friends have approached me seeking my comments on some of their actions on my behalf, very sadly I'm compelled to write again:

(1). Why I suspended the fast:
Having been refused medical care on the 41st day, it was clear to me that the only way I could get hospitalized would be by pretending to be suicidal. While I'd not hesitate to resort to such tactics in the near future as necessary, I decided that this was not the time for it, while the friends were acting on my behalf. This idea came to me as I sat in silence on the 42nd day; I decided to end the fast on the 45th day when I were to attend the Quaker meeting. The temporary life that I envisioned while giving friends' efforts some time, was only as a resident volunteer for the Missionaries of Charity. In fact, I took the decision to end the fast only after talking to these nuns, and receiving their permission to stay. I had hoped that I would be able to stay with them for 2-3 months. Despite them having done me unprecedented great favors, at this point I only have permission to stay 3 (or possibly 4) more weeks with them. I'm not worried about this though, as the Lord shall provide, and that His will be done.

(2). Unknown effort by some friends:
In an interesting coincidence, on that same 42nd day, my friends Maureen H., Margery C. (and perhaps some others) had tried, unsuccessfully, to reach me at the place that I was staying. Unfortunately, instead of just asking to see me, while keeping the details of the situation private, they had revealed too much information to staff members at the place, whose natural response was to place their legal safety first. This resulted in considerable inconvenience to me, as I had to be examined again by a doctor on site on the beginning of the 43rd day, who concluded that a hospital would not admit me. However, this unexpected and unnecessary expenditure of physical and mental energy, together with additional physical efforts to clean and pack my stuff in preparation of my anticipated departure, made me feel quite weak on 44th and 45th days. To be more precise, my heart just couldn't keep up with the physical demands. But that's now history. What these friends tried to do was possibly to get some medical help for me; but the details perhaps would remain unknown to me.

(3). Lorcan Otway's appeal to the Swedish Consulate:
My Friend Lorcan "Larry" Otway has been among the first to write on my behalf to the Swedish Consulate. Please find the details on his Blog site. A few weeks ago, he offered to show me the reply from the Consulate, which I politely refused as I have seen enough of those.

(4). Linda H. contacts Quakers in Sweden:
My Friend Linda H. (perhaps with some others) have contacted a member of the Stockholm Quaker Meeting. While I respect this initiative and commend the Friend in Sweden for the very clear and comprehensive response, it really is an apology for the status quo. The Friend in Stockholm had mentioned, and Linda has gotten excited about, the prospect of me immigrating to Sweden through an employment offer. To make things short, let me quote from my first application to Sweden in April 1999: "Although I could have easily obtained a tourist visa to Sweden based on my academic credentials and travel records(please note the US, UK, and Canadian visas previously held by me), and seek asylum while in Sweden, I chose to follow the path of openness. And at this point I do not wish to enter Sweden by other means such as pre-arranged employment or marriage either." My calling has alway been to try to resettle in Sweden in only one way, to pursue which unbeaten path I was called, regardless of results or consequences. Would a man who so strongly wishes to choose his country, be willing to work for just any employer, whom he has not even heard about or seen? I'd be content to live without a job, or even without freedom, only if I could find the country to call my own. That shall remain my first and foremost need.

Out of respect for friends efforts, however, I shall prepare a résumé in a week or two. Such a resume could perhaps be useful in showing Sweden and UNHCR, the nature of the person to whom they've denied the opportunity to live a dignified life. As to the prospect of finding an employment based opportunity through an employer that's acceptable to me, however, I'd predict that a résumé is likely to be more useful in writing my obituary :-)

Anyone who wishes to advocate for an employment-based path is well advised by me to first find out whether a stateless person (as already acknowledged by Swedish immigration authorities), presently sojourning outside of Sweden in a third-country, would be eligible to receive a Swedish Travel document (a temporary passport) to enter Sweden based on this path of immigration. If the answer to this question is "No", then there's no point in even thinking about this path.

(5). Letter-Writing:
I'm fairly disappointed that, to my knowledge, none of my close friends seem to have knowledge or faith in a letter-writing campaign in the spirit and method of Amnesty International . Perhaps they should search the web. Anyway, it's never expected that the first letter would would elicit a positive response or accomplish anything. However, if the writers' have faith, and not be disheartened by the faces or words of the authorities, something positive could perhaps be accomplished after several dozen letters. But:

Firstly, I have a reasonable prediction that if my friends (just like most other people) consider an effort only when my life is in imminent danger, then most likely nothing will be accomplished while I'm yet alive.

Secondly, to me it's the human dignity, not mere physical existence, that make a human life worthwhile. So, if friends appeal to authorities to just save my body, I cannot say that I'd be very pleased. As for me, knowing that the human body is very temporary, I'd happily die anytime, but it's an unbearable pain and a shame for me to live a life without dignity or equity.

Thirdly, I really wish & hope that friends write letters using their own words, ideas, and feelings. If one is moved to write "shame on you" to authorities, there should be no reason not to. Last Sunday, Margery requested to meet with me today to devise some sample letters. As I have to leave today at 12:15 PM to volunteer at my first refuge since ending the 45-day fast, I'd not be able to meet with her though. That was the source of motivation that made me overcome the writer's block last night. I'll perhaps leave a note for Margery, with how we may perhaps work on this by e-mail or phone. As I see it, the main things to emphasize in a letter would be that:
- I knew even at the time of my first application in 1999, and could easily have entered Sweden on a tourist pretenses, and applied for asylum while there, but chose to be forthright in my application;
- I have been recognized as a UNHCR Mandate refugee (UNHCR ROW# 68859), and that UNHCR Regional Office in Wshington DC even made a resettlement request to Sweden on my Bhalf in November 2001;
- it would be a terrible shame if only the liars, cheaters and manipulators get the privilege of choosing their land of refuge, while a forthright person is condemned to suffer.

As for the addresses and case numbers, they're available near the bottom of the "Status Update" page on my website.

(6). My future involvement:
I wish not be heavily or intimately involved with any efforts that friends might wish to make; not because my desires have changed even a bit. When I stared this quest in 1999, I was ready and willing to be either a pioneer or a martyr, and now (for the last few years) I'd be happy to be a prisoner as well. How and when I may have to make a decision in this regard is pretty much beyond my control, but I'm hoping that I would be able to wait in silence in present lifestyle for a t least a few more weeks.

Thanks to all my friends, and especially to Roman Catholic charity, which in my experience is the strongest manifestation of God's grace in this world, which has sheltered and nourished me, and kept be very busy.